howdy, all. ready for more pointlessness from the infamous Auslander? good, because i am! I'm sitting here, talking to my girlfriend on the phone while she writes an essay, laughing until my rear comes loose over various things when i start reading essays she's written in the past. now, i know most people with a brain on here feel that writing with that lil ol' capslock button pressed is really frickin' annoying...i feel the same way. apparently, so does she. so now, i share with you an essay she cranked out over this very topic. it made me laugh, and i hope it has similar effects on you. ^.^ ********************************************************************* Ashley --Aus's GF-- Comp and Rhet Mr. Stevenson Effect Essay March 8, 2006 You Pressed Caps Lock and Now I Hate You. Have you ever had to suffer the mental anguish of having to read a message typed in all caps? The agonizing mental torment of messages like these can have many ghastly effects on a person, and the relationship between the receiver and the sender. Though one may be skeptical about the following accusations, I assure you that you will feel the tragedy deep within your very heart. Your soul will cry out from the heartache, as you relate. Typing in all caps can lead to a loss of interest, suspension of conversation, and even the end of a friendship. Typing in all caps can lead to a loss of interest. This situation about to be further explained, at first glance, would lead one to believe that typing a message in all caps would be a simple, insignificant mistake. Unfortunately this is quite the contrary to the fact, because underneath the innocent cover of ignorance is the terrifying truth. When a person is sent a message in all capitals, he or she is highly annoyed, and frustrated. So what does said person do? Two choices are available, get angry with the writer and continue to read the message, or stop reading the message and be annoyed with writer for their inconsiderate nature. Usually, the reader is forced to continue reading, and endure the pain-staking agony afflicted by the inconsiderate writer. The resentment slowly grows, and churns deep in the minds of the afflicted. This simple incident is tied into a vicious cycle of events, but the direct effect would be loss of further interest in the message as well as further messages from the original writer. This is the first stepping stone to the complete disregard of the message and animosity of the utmost degree toward the writer. Typing in all caps can result in the suspension of conversation. One may be wondering how this is possible; the two events do not seem to be related in the least. Typing in all capitals is usually used to show screaming or yelling. There is not a single person whom enjoys the psychological belittling, known as yelling. Screaming makes one feel like a child being scolded by his or her parents for stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. When a mood of this caliber strikes, confrontation always arises. These confrontations put the receiver and the sender of the message on the defensive side. This then leads to arguments. Once both parties are upset at the other, conversation will be temporally terminated. Typing in all caps can ruin a friendship or relationship between two people. No matter how secluded or close the two people may be. The final end in this bizarre tango between two people is the end of their friendship or deterioration of what is left of the relationship. A situation like this one occurs when the two parties, the receiver and sender, see things at opposite sides of the spectrum, neither party understands the other. At this point of the scenario both parties, the sender and receiver, are usually beyond the point of reconciliation. The receiver sees the sender as ignorant, inconsiderate, and bothersome. The sender sees the receiver as too nit picky, stubborn, and whiny. Thus the two split, never to be the same again. Both wonder how such a “simple” situation got so far out of hand that these circumstances could destroy the deep bond know as friendship. Typing in all caps is a serious decision that is not to be taken without due consideration. Typing in all capitals causes severe consequences such as loss of interest in the topic and sender, suspension of conversation, and the deterioration of the friendship or relationship. Do not let similar events happen. Ignorance and laziness are prime reasons for such occurrences, that can be easily avoided with just a little bit of forethought, time, and consideration for the fellow human being. What would you do if you lost a friend over such preventable events? Not only does your own infinitesimal world crumble in certain aspects, so does the other person’s. How could you look yourself in the mirror knowing it was all your fault? ********************************************************************* you can find her at myspace
ahh yes ALL CAPS SUCK. lol me likey the essay she wrote there aus. twas good. one of my friends on msn uses all caps sometimes, and i want to rip her head off when she does. just kidding... maybe.
when it comes to ripping heads off, i can vouch for it being easier if you perforate the neck first (like perforated paper in a notebook). a good knife will work very well.
This KEY is the enemy For those of you who may not be aware, when anything is typed in upper and lowercase letters, the way the eyes and the brain work, allow us to read faster, and more importantly, comprehend what we're reading. We recognize word shapes, rather than the words themselves. When sentences and paragraphs are typed in ALL CAPS, all the word shapes are now rectangular, and we now must concentrate on deciphering each word, and by doing this, can actually have problems comprehending what we read. Typing in all caps online is considered "shouting", it isn't easier to read because the eye doesn't track as well when all the letters are the same height (& somewhat the same shape). That's why you'll never see a book or newspaper/magazine article done in all caps.
Hmm that's v interesting Ireland. You learn something new every day. As for Aus and his neck perferating habbits... lol
MONKEYS ARE THE KILLER OF SOCIETY! BARBECUE MONKEY SOUNDS VERY TASTY I MIGHT ADD. IF WE HAD A NO CAPS BUTTON...THEN WHAT WOULD WE DO TO PISS PEOPLE OFF? HAVE A NICE DAY
it's only because i don't want your face to scare off your wife and kids that i will now beat the unholy fecal matter out of you...with a rubber hose. ^.^
perforating is no fun aus, yes it may be quicker, but then you dont have the pleasure of the slow death
LMAO. yeah well i like the look in the eyes. so i go for that. why are we talking about this again? just wondering, casue this is a thread about all caps, just a thought.
good idea, but try selling that to the manufatures. actually, they might like that, gets them more money.
