It was valentines day.. and Rob thought he would surprise Donna with a special valentines card.. she wore a wide smile on her face and she opened the nicely designed envelope. Inside, was a beautiful valentines card. Go here -> http://freespace.virgin.net/crimson.king/valentine.jpg to view the card. Rob spoke the words - "Happy Valentines day Donna," And he knelt down to kiss her, when she gave him the fright of his life. Go here -> http://www.emmerdale.org/emmerdale/news/15sept03/donnarob.jpg to see what happened. Enjoy! ps. Tesco is a supermarket - http://www.tesco.com
HAPPY EX-VALENTINE'S DAY A man went to the market this last week to buy Valentine's cards for his daughter and mother. The 50 feet of displays for hundreds of cards astounded him. He muttered out loud, "I wonder if they have cards for ex-spouses." The clerk behind the counter said, "Oh, yes sir, they do have an 'ex' category, but they're in Sporting Goods." "Really?" "Yes sir. They're called bullets."
EXCUSES WHY MEN FORGET VALENTINE'S DAY * The Florist couldn't find your house, did you move? * I sent a candygram. Someone must have eaten it. * The Hallmark Store was closed, and I didn't want to send less than the best. * I sent an e-mail card. You never got it? google must have messed up again! * I left a message on your answering machine to meet me for dinner. Where were you? * I didn't know you liked jewelry. * I thought Saint Valentine's Day was a Catholic holy Day. * Your mailman must have been shot in a Post Office Massacre. * I thought we would do something different this year. * I thought it would mean I was making a commitment. * You didn't remind me!
UNPOPULAR VALENTINE'S DAY CARDS * Thinking of you sweetheart, which, technically, the court order can't prevent. * Just wanted to say "I love you" when I wasn't falling down drunk. * If only we weren't so closely related! * Even though I'm a Bosnian Serb, You're my favorite Croat Muslim! * I'm too shy to ask in person, but what is that thing on your face? A mole, a wart? WHAT???? * You're too beautiful to resist, my under-the-ether dental patient. * I'm more than half interested in you, my hermaphroditic darling! * The Medicated Shampoo Took Care of It. * I'm Glad the Arkansas State Troopers Brought You to My Hotel Room, Valentine! * I'll Give You Money To Have Sex With Me. * Just thinking of you while I am drunk and no one else will have sex with me.
